I won’t eat Tide Pods or do the dances; I’m starting the newest TikTok craze: falling out of trees.

Be mindful when the music is playing. Don't eat Tide pods. Don't dance. Do run screaming into the woods.

The music coming out of the record player was full of praise for making healthier choices, such as meditating instead of eating detergent pods, or running and screaming joyfully in the woods instead of angrily pointing out everything that is wrong with the world.

The MYND unit is a self-aware computainment device, capable of reading data discs (like ancient vinyl albums, CDs, DVD, etc) and making simple yes/no decisions about them (thus the acronym, for Makes Yes/No Decisions). In a recent test, the unit said "YES" to music, peace on earth, the garden of Eden, and Pac-Man eating a piece of fruit, but it gave a firm "NO" to the concept of Pac-Man eating planet Earth.

The machine generated disc based physical media promoting music, world peace, outdoor nudity, and healthy snacks; while counter-indicating globalist pac-mania.

If you want to keep the tape running smoothly, dance at picnics in the park with your loved ones rather than letting the red Pacmen eat the world.